Monday, November 9, 2009

This sucks...

So I received a call to confirm an ultrasound for tomorrow, I cancelled when my baby died. I scheduled it with a company who does 3D u/s, I booked the appointment at 14 weeks, being my naive self. I wanted to get really good pictures of the baby to send to my DH whose in Iraq. I cancelled the appointment a month ago. It was hard enough to cancel the appointment and say out loud my baby died. But now I just get another slap in the face, that I'm not pregnant. My baby is gone. Just a shitty day, I failed a huge test, I'm sick, and then that. I should just go to bed but I can't stop thinking of everything that sucks in my life right now...I know she is gone, but I want her back. I don't want another baby, I want my Hope.


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